Let’s not Get Married

World is small. I went to my friend’s wedding on Monday. It was in Niagara. 

I have met lots of lots of Turkish people. When I heard one of the names, it was super familiar. Then I realized I knew that person not personally but okay okay here is the story. So before I came here I had a boyfriend. We dated for like 3 and half years. Anyway when I decided to leave Turkey, he also started to search for countries and we both decided to come to Canada. We were not thinking of coming here together, because of him btw, I certainly would like to come here. I know I know, he never wanted to be with me in an intimate way. He was just dating me and that was it for him. So he wanted to be a refugee here so he searched for another refugee who already lives in Canada but is familiar to his family. Soo they found this person who I met at the wedding. They were talking everyday about here, how to get benefits etc. I was also on the calls sometimes, he was showing me the messages and last but least we worked at the same place with that family when I was in Turkey. Well not at the same time, they were already here when I started to work, but stiillll. They don’t know me of course they know my ex boyfriend. After very long talks and thoughts, he decided to go to Poland because it’s cheaper than Canada. I think I don’t need to explain the rest of the story. Of course he broke up with me, and wasn’t even invited to go with him but I am glad. Oh god we were toxic, I didn’t know it then but once this thing was over, it was clear. But yeah fuck, I have never imagine that I can meet with that family. I actually forgot that they exist. But yea, the world is small. 

The wedding was small, they don’t have their family with them in Canada. So it was just a couple of friends and a couple of Turkish people. It was weird actually. So I have been to lots of weddings when I was in Turkey, in general our weddings are huge. Like I am talking about maybe 250-300 people. Isn’t it huge? And when you have a wedding in Turkey, if you are the groom and bride, on that day, you don’t do anything. Your friends and family take care of every single thing. Someone grab the bride, go to the hair salon with her, someone helps her to wear the dress, someone makes the makeup, other people greet the guests. And it is the same for the groom. But for my friend it was super different. 

Day before the wedding we called and asked them if they needed any help. They said no, we had the best man and bridesmaid. We said okay. I mean someone needs to help them on that day, that day is you know excited and they can get nervous etc. So we assume they have someone. 

At 10 AM we took a bus, and when we arrived in Niagara it was a bit early so we decided to go to their house and see if we could do something. Once we arrived at their house she was washing the dishes and he was looking a bit upset. Of course we were cheering with my boyfriend, we were singing traditional wedding songs for them to make them a bit more in the mood. But no, they were upset. Maybe it’s because they have no family here I am not sure. Anyway, she didn’t even know how to do her makeup and hair. Oh and there was no one with them btw. So my boyfriend took the groom and they went to pick up a bouquet and veil. I was trying to make her makeup and hair. 

So I realize the groom was a bit out of town, if you know what I mean. So I decided to cheer her harder, it worked ahahaha. Thank god she was happy at the end of the day. 

The weird thing is there were lots of middle aged Turkish people. They know the couple very well. And no one literally no one helped them. This waken me up, we are fucking alone in here. Noone will be with us if we need any help. We are fucking alone.

Another weird thing was the groom’s behaviour. We were staring each other with myboyfriend and asking the same things, what the fuck have happened to them! They were not like that at all. We have known them from the beginning, for like 1 year. Maybe it’s because of the stress of the wedding day but still. If my future husband would act like that on the wedding day, I would certainly cancel the wedding and run away. He didn’t even care. I am not judging them but seeing a couple like that was a bit frightening to me. Is wearing a ring killing the vibe? And everyone during the wedding was talking about how hard being married is, but you can get used to it. What!? Like what!? Then marry with a fucking grown up man bitch and dont talk shits during the weeding! 

Iiighh, after weeding we wet to a pub, drink and (finally) laugh. Then one thing led to another and we ended up at Arcade. It was super fun. We play games and collect tickets. My boyfriend was trying so hard to collect tickets because of my loves to fluffy toys ahaha but we realize it may take 1 year to collect enough tickets for those toys. We ended up buying the most expensive wallet of mine. It cost 60 dollars total to get that much ticket to get that wallet. I don’t think I will go there and try to collect tickets. It is worthless but whatever we had fuunn!

After that wedding and peoples reaction to marriage I don’t think I want to get married. I don’t know. Btw married couples were unhappy men, especially the ones who have kids. God! 

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